Overdrive

When the night is dark and quiet, my mind goes into an overdrive.
Thoughts race through my mind.
Some good ones, most of the time, crazy ones.
It's when there's nothing to distract me, my mind decides to distract itself.
When it's so quiet, fears that I have surface.
Clear and loud.
I can't ignore them, and it keeps me awake till I fall asleep from exhaustion.
I know I think too much and maybe most of my fears are just fragments of my imagination.
I worry about the present. I worry about the future.
I worry about things that I can't control.
Which I know is useless.
Because we can't change what is happening and we can't control what is going to happen.
Life is such that we have to adapt in whatever situation we find ourselves in.
Many times unpleasant.
There is no point in being stubborn as the only one drowning would be ourselves.
I believe life is fated.
That our life path is written somewhere in the universe and we are just going through the motion.
Everything happens for a reason.
People we meet, people we love, people we hurt.
We can't escape our destiny.
If it's meant to be, then it will be.
And I think my parents divorce was meant to be as well.
People makes decisions and they have to live by it.
You can't blame others for the path you have chosen.
I always believe that you wouldn't know whether you've chosen to journey on the right path until you've arrived at the final destination.
And how would you know the other path won't take you to the same place?
Some people are pessimistic.
I get that. I have my dark cloudy days too.
But people who are negative and stubborn gets on my nerves.
If you don't want any advice, then stop complaining.
If you don't want to change, then don't blame others if they can't accept you.
Can't please everyone.
Just have to pick who we want to please.
I'm not sure what I'm rambling on about anymore.
My thoughts are everywhere.
There are things on my mind that's driving my nuts and yet I can't blog about it.
I've realised that self censorship is the way to go for this little blog of mine.
It's hard to find someone to trust where I can say whatever's on my mind and not worry about their reaction.
I'm so blunt sometimes and I know it.
The older I get, the lonelier the world seems to me.
Gone were innocence and acceptance.
All people talk about is money.
Money this...money that.
Status is about money.
Happiness is about money. 
Filial piety is about money.
Intelligence in about money.
Worthiness is about money.
Love is about money.
And I'm so sick of it.
Is a person without money less human?
Do they not bleed?
Maybe it's just me...the weird one...because everyone around me talks money.
Kids compare pocket money.
Teenagers compare gadgets.
Young adults compare salaries.
Seniors compare childrens.
Maybe even when dead they are comparing their graves.
Among all, to me, comparing of spouses is the worst.
I have a wonderful husband though I admit he has his flaws.
But please don't tell me how good someone else husband is just because he could buy his wife a BMW and lives like a queen in a bungalow.
Princess Diana lived a fairy tale and yet she wasn't happy.
She's also dead.
Yet in this materialistic world we live in, people are shallow.
No amount of money is enough.
No doubt we need money to live in this world.
The only thing still free in this world is the air we breathe.
If one cannot find contentment in what one already have then one cannot be truly happy.
It'll be like chasing after a rainbow.

What luck

Bad news today.
I won't be starting salsa classes =(
What a bummer...I was so looking forward to it.
Since Joverse was only free today to go sign up, the class was already full.
We should've gone and sign up earlier but I didn't think it was so popular.
There goes my plans.
Now I got to find something else to do.
Maybe I'll take up the beginners Mandarin class which is starting in October.
Gotta make up my mind.

I'm now too full to think.
Had steamboat at Shabu Shabu in Puchong with Mum, Aunt Serene and Big Aunt.
Ate way too much again.
On Thursday, another steamboat dinner with galfriends.
Saturday, steamboat dinner with family to celebrate Mooncake festival.
3 times steamboat in a week.
Steamboat overload man.

I'm missing Eric so much.
I'm so not cut out for this long distance relationship thingy.
To me, long distance is not a relationship at all.
I hate it and yet I'm stuck in it.
Ooohhhh...which gets me thinking, maybe I should go and buy the Tarot card kit I saw in MPH.
Maybe it'll give me some guidance or just occupy my time.
I might just be good at it...who knows right?

My plum blossom cross stitch is sitting in a corner.
I'm so not in the mood to stitch...I lost the drive.
But I really should get started or I'll never ever get it done.
It's so huge and my procrastination is extending the timeline by years.

There seem to be so many things to do and yet I can't bring myself to do them.

Lost my mojo.

Restaurant Jit Ben @ Berkeley, Klang

Dinner tonight was with Big Aunt's (Mum's eldest sister) family, Mum, Aunt Serene and Melaine.
As I'm seriously bad with roads in Klang, I made Melaine drive us there =)
Big Aunt son recommended this restaurant as it serves Foochow dishes.
And being a Foochow family, we salivate whenever we think of "red wine mee suah"

To get to Restaurant Jit Ben, it's not that hard.
But I can only give directions from the federal highway 'cause that was the road we took earlier.
On the federal highway coming from Subang, go all the way until you meet the Klang toll.
Then go on the flyover (while on the flyover, you'll see Jaya Jusco on your right)
Keep left after the flyover and take the exit on the left.
You will come to a roundabout. Do a 3 o'clock.
Go straight and you'll see a church on your left.
Go straight a little more and you'll see Restaurant Jit Ben on your right.

First up was the 'red wine mee suah". It was really good. Even better than those we had in Sitiawan. Have been told that they made the red wine themselves and the mee suah came all the way from Sitiawan =) The best thing of all...they used a lot of ginger in this dish...loves ginger!

This kuey teow look-a-like is actually hand made, something like "pan mee". Cooked with lots of "la la"(clams), the soup is super tasty eventhough it's such a simple bowl of noodles.

Next up was chicken herbal soup. It's bitter yet sweet at the same time. Hard to describe. But it's really good for health, heaty though so don't drink too much. Apparently, this soup is boiled with ginseng too. The perfect soup on a cold rainy day. According to my cousin, it taste better if the soup was boiled with duck instead of chicken. Too bad they ran out of ducky tonight =(

This is super yummilicious. I couldn't help myself...I had to gobble down a few pieces first before I could snap a pic. It just looks to yummy to resist. That's why by the time I managed to put my chopsticks down, the dish was almost gone =P Mushrooms, sea cucumber and 3-layers pork was braised to perfection. The layer of porky fat in between tender meat and soft skin is addictive! If only porky fats doesn't make me fat....sigh...wishful thinking

A Foochow specialty. Sweet and sour fish maw. Normally, the fish maw is cooked with sea cucumber, but tonight, all the expensive sea cucumber when into the porky dish. This is one of my fav Foochow food. And this restaurant cooked it really well. It wasn't too watery or too thick, just the right consistency. The fish maw was tasty and not oily at all. To me the spiciness gave it an extra 'ommph' but it was too much for the rest of the family. That meant more for me and less for them...hahaha =P

We also had a dish of deep fried fish but I didn't have a chance to snap a pic. By the time everyone attacked it, even the bones were gone. There was also a dish of some vege thingy that I didn't fancy so I didn't bother taking a pic.

The Foochow dishes here beats those in Sitiawan hands down.

Quality in Sitiawan has been on the decline in recent years and that's a shame.

Thankfully, we now have a place to head to while we're in KL whenever we crave for Foochow food.

Oh...as it turns out, the lady boss/chef of the restaurant is from Sitiawan too.

Man...Sitiawan Foochow people are everywhere these days!

Anyways, it turns out that lady boss knew our family back in those good ol'days.

Small small world I tell you.

I'm still so full as I stuffed myself silly at dinner.

I'm putting on way too much weight lately =(

Too much eating and not much moving around.

Yes, I'm lazy.

Good news is, I'll be starting salsa classes soon!

A Wedding and A Baby

It's been a busy weekend.
But what could be better than a wedding and a baby right?
First of all...gotta talk about my fake eyelash.
Oooohhh....I love them.
Works way better than mascara(hate those smudging) but takes damn long to put it on right!
Took me about 30 minutes to stick them on.
It was tedious but I've been told that practise makes perfect.
This eyelash that I bought came with a strong glue.
Got glue all over my fingers...maybe I wasn't doing it right...but the eyelash stuck on the whole night securely.
My only concern...did I glue them on any of my own eyelash?
I will totally freak out if I rip off what tiny bit of my natural short eyelashes when removing the fakes O_O

Aren't they gorgeous? Everyone was commenting how natural they look =)

Weng is Eric's cousin and the dinner was at Jaya Palace.

Seems like whichever wedding I attend, I end up sitting at the registration table.

While the bride and groom was all ready to make their grand entrance, Audrey(Eric's sis) and I quickly snap a pic with the huge poster where everyone wrote well wishes...some just left their signature like celebrities =P

Wedding favours. It's a biscuit sitting in that cute little basket.

As I was the only one who brought a normal size bag instead of a small demure dinner bag, this is what happened. At the end of the night, 8 of these were incubating in my bag.

Even the Chef had to be part of the food presentation entourage. Kinda a funny sight but not as funny as...

...this! Entertainers of the night sang and danced to cha cha cha with some healthy dose of rock & roll.

April, Audrey, Me, Lye and Eric's mum.

Sad to say, but the food wasn't that great.

I had a great time though =)

Get ready for overload of cuteness...I'm not kidding..Cuteness Alert

Meet baby Braxton <3

He's only one week old but so so so cute.

Much congratulations to Bryan and Amy on the arrival of their lovely baby.

Braxton smiled alot while I was carrying him and he has two cute little dimples.

He's going to be breaking lots of gals hearts when he grows up.

Oh..and he fell asleep while I was cradling him =)

Yes, my clock is ticking faster and louder.

OMG

So, the title is a little dramatic.
But damn alot has been happening and I didn't get to blog for some time.
That's because I didn't have a freaking internet connection at home.
Since I'm blogging now even when I should be getting ready for tonight's dinner, that means I finally am connected to the world again.
I was feeling so lost for the whole week.
Feel damn good to be back in the virtual world.
So many things to update, so many things to plan, so many things to do, so many people i want to meet up with.
Thank goodness I have all the time in the world.
Okay, got to go now.
Need to get ready to atttend a wedding dinner.
I'm just so happy...it's a good good day.
Will blog more later....cause you know...I'm connected!!!

Again...

My bags are packed, but I'm not ready to go.
I've done this countless times and yet my heart is breaking.
I'll never get used to leaving.
I don't want to say goodbye.
And yet, the choice is not mine.
I wish things were different.
I really do.
Don't ask me why because it just is.
I've always believed things happen for a reason.
God must have His own plans for us.
And everything is fated.
It's not easy, but I've done it before.
I'll feel like crap for the first few days.
I'll smile but my heart is aching.
I'll cry when I miss him at night.
If I have only one wish in this life, I would wish to never be apart from my love.
I'll be sleeping alone, tonight.

Beautiful Skies

Nicole and Elie asked me to go watch the Annual Macau fireworks competition that's happening every Saturday until the finals in Oct.
Meeting place was in front of the old Lisboa at 9pm.
I got there on time.
And they got there when the first session ended.
Yes, it's called Malaysian time ('cause in KL people are never punctual except for some minorities) and the irony of the situation, I was the only Malaysian -_-

We then decided to walk to the other side of Nam Van Lake to have a better view of the next session of fireworks at 10pm.
Nicole was wearing a flowy tube dress and we were crossing the street when her dress got blew up by wind.
And she flashed some guys =P
We ended up with a not so great spot on at this new viewing area.
Oh well, mabe next year we should head to the Macau Tower to have a real fireworks experience.
There's supposed to be music and stuffs to go with all the booming.
Obviously we were to far to hear anything.

After all that walking and pretty skies, we needed a drink badly.
And ended up at this restaurant serving Spanish food.
Ordered a Sangria and stayed there till 2am.
And witness some really disturbing sights.
I saw a bunch of kids got drunk.
They look no older than 16.
One even got so drunk he dropped to the floor.
A few needed help to walk.
Then there was this Philippino couple who looked like they were fighting.
But then suddenly they chased each other...saw her bra...they lied down on the dirty floor...they guy stayed on top of her for super long time...
Thought they were fucking out in public but then the guy wasn't moving.
Thought they fell asleep.
Now that I think about it, that place is kinda dodgy.
Who said Macau is boring right?

Talay Thai @ Fisherman's Wharf, Macau

Yesterday, we headed for dinner at one of the nicest Thai Restaurant in Macau.
Talay Thai is located at the Fisherman's Wharf, the ambiance at this place is just amazing.
Super relaxed and beautiful view.
Just the perfect place for a date.

Most people would choose to dine al fresco.

The place was packed at dinner time.

Come early if you want to have a nice table.

There's indoor dining as well.

Not very popular.

Except when it's winter and it's freezing outside.
Or rain.

Seafood tomyum. Extremely spicy but yummilicious to the max.

Pad thai with many huge prawns. I like it =)

Lala fried in some sauce and lots of basil(I think). Don't really fancy the lala.

Fried rice with shrimp paste. All the ingredients are piles onto the rice and you're supposed to mix it I guess. But the plate was too small for any mixing action. Eric and Mum said it's like belacan fried rice. Not too bad. Portion is generous too.

Stir fried mince pork to be eaten with.....

...Lettuce.

Fill up the lettuce with pork and stuff it in your mouth. Finger licking good =)

Talay Thai is obviously a famous makan place in Macau.

The food is great, the view is great, even the service is better than a lot of other places in Macau.

This is one place that you wouldn't mind the service charge in the bill.

If you've been to Macau many many times and looking for something new to try, head to Talay Thai.

Talay Thai website

Nestle : Banana Chocolate

In Macau, you can find some really nice and some funny flavoured ice cream.

Was in the shop and came across Nestle Banana Chocolate Drumstick =)

I love choc and I like bananas ;P

Chupa Chup used to have this Banana Choc flavour lollipop but I haven't seen them in the market for years now. So sad =(

I like sucking on their choc banana lolli.

Banana and choc goes really well together, don't you think so?

Looks like a regular drumstick. I was curious to find out if there are any banana bits in them. You know, like ice cream potong that has red bean or cendol in them?

Thick choc...and banana? Real bananas?

Okay...the choc is thick alright. Sadly, no bananas in sight for bites.

After all the thick choc has gone into my tummy, you get choc and banana ice cream.

I like it. The banana is aromatic and not too sweet.

I know lar...ice cream ain't helping me with my wish list(to lose weight lar)

But got banana...makes it a little bit healthy right?

Yalar...trying to come up with excuses to have ice cream.
Oh...the weather is really really hot also!!!

Leona Lewis : Happy

I'm sure everyone knows Leona Lewis by now.
If you don't, then you must've been lost under a coconut shell for the past couple of years.
Simon Cowell loves her and I'm sure many guys feel the same way.

I loved Bleeding Love. Still do.
I remember when it was number 1 on the charts all over the world, you can't escape it.
Whichever radio station you're listening to, Leona's there.
Even if you try to switch station once you hear the opening melody of Bleeding Love, chances are, you'll jump right into the same song again on another station.
And the DJ's seemed to be playing it every single chance they get.
I had friends complaining it was Love overload.
As for me, I can sing to Bleeding Love over and over and over again.
It's so haunting.

Anyways, found out Leona has a new single out titled Happy from her 2nd album Echo.
I thought it was a happy song.
I was expecting it to be happy.
It's called "Happy" for Christ sake.
Turns out I was wrong.
It was a sad sappy love song.
And I'm kinda hooked on it.
Crazy huh?
A sad song called "Happy".
But the lyrics are so meaningful.




Leona Lewis - Happy Lyrics

Someone once told me that you have to choose
What you win or lose
You can't have everything

Don't you take chances
You might feel the pain
Don't you love in vain
'Cause love won't set you free

I can't stand by the side
And watch this life pass me by
So unhappy
But safe as could be

So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge,
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
I'm just trying to be happy
Just wanna be happy, yeah

Holding on tightly
Just can't let it go
Just trying to play my role
Slowly disappear

But all these days
They feel like they're the same
Just different faces
Different place
Get me out of here

I can't stand by the side
Ooh, no
And watch this life pass me by
Pass me by

So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge?
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
I'm just trying to be happy
Oh, happy
Ohh

So when it turns that I can't see?
I'll count on a stranger on this road
But don't say victim
Don't say anything

So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge?
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
I just wanna be happy
Happy
I just wanna be
Oh
I just wanna be
Happy.

******************************************

Mood of the song is anything but happy.
Apparently this song is leaked.
But it might just be leaked by the label themselves.
Drama is good publicity no doubt.

But I think this is great breakup song.
Imagine a guy/gal just dumped you, this is just the right pick-me-up song.
Makes you feel good that you gave the relationship a try.
Eventhough it hurts.
Because we are chasing one dream.
To be happy.

McDonalds Chocolate Pie

We decided to have McD's for dinner tonight.
Took a short walk to the McD's near our home.
And it was a smoky walk alright.
The Hungry Ghost Festival was in motion.
Many people were on the sidewalk burning paper money as offerings.
Funny thing is I saw joss sticks being held up by poking into fruits.
One banana was seen holding 5 joss sticks!
Lots of burning, lots of smoke, lots of food for the hungry spirits.

Anyways, we made it safely to McD's through smoky eyes. They are having a promo of Chocolate Pie and Blueberry Sundae. So obviously we had to try those.


Mum had a McCrispy chicken burger while I had nuggets. In Macau, you can choose the Hot Mustard Sauce. It's pretty good. Just ignore the word 'hot'. Even I'm hotter than this sauce.

This Blueberry Sundae is going for MOP 1.00 (which is about RM 0.40) with any McValue Meal. Super cheap lar. I think it tasted like Ribena actually. Mum finished the whole thing and we had this conversation.

Mum : Taste like Ribena.
Me : Yeah...it says Blueberry Sundae. Ribena is blackcurrant.
Mum : Blueberry not supposed to be blue meh? Why red?
Me : -_- Ribena is made of blackcurrant, so is it black?

This is the Chocolate Pie. No idea why is it shaped like a triangle.

I took a bite...and it taste kinda weird. The pastry reminds me of a puff instead of pie and I could taste the oil it was fried in.

A few more bites and you get a little chocolate paste. Still didn't help much in the taste department. This thing is super oily and that spoilt everything.

A few more bites and it's oozing chocolate. Though I'm a huge choc fan...I had Mum finish most this pie. Fail man. Never again.

After McD's, we had to brave our way through all the burning and smoke again.

Made a stop in Watsons to get my contact lens solution and they don't have the brand I'm using.

So I got a different one.

Won't make that much of a difference anyway.

Wanted to get my fav Vidal Sassoon shampoo as it was on promo.

God...I just love this shampoo.

The smell...the way it makes my hair feel...I love it!

And it's super cheap, in my opinion lar.

Believe it or not...1 liter shampoo+1 liter conditioner is only about RM40.

Granted, my hair looks nice no matter what shampoo I use (good genes I supposed), but I just love Vidal Sassoon.

Wonder why they stop selling it in Malaysia.

I promise, it they sell it wherever I am, I'm a customer for life =)

Shen Garden Restaurant, Venetian Macau

Unfortunately, we decided to have dinner at this restaurant one night out in Taipa, Macau. Apparently, they specializes in Shanghainese cuisine.

Yup...those are empty picture frames on the wall. Don't ask me why. Send them an email if you're desperate enough and it's bugging you.

Everything on the table is mostly white.

Yes...the place is deserted. No idea why we wanna eat here in the first place. If the restaurant is empty, warning alarms should have sounded loud and clear in our heads.

Yeah...a chicken that could "drink" is on the menu.

Free appetizers. Yippee -_-

Spare ribs.

Some duck .

Stupidly, we ordered the "Drinking chicken". It was freezing cold and super salty.

Rice is serve with a piece of bacon.

Vege with some weird beancurd ribbons thingy. Tasteless and I almost puke trying the ribbons. Yucks.

Seriously, either something is wrong with this restaurant's chefs or Shanghainese cuisine needs some serious flavouring.

Can you believe it....the plates which the food are served on are cold.

Not room temperature which is still acceptable.

BUT...fridge cold plates.

That meant all our dishes are cold even if it was meant to be hot.

I was super disappointed =(

Spoilt my mood. Spoilt my appetite.

And service sucks as well.

Now we know why the restaurant was empty -_-

Look For A Star

With all the controversy going on with Andy Lau in Malaysia and his secret wedding in Las Vegas last year, Eric and I finally watched his movie Look For A Star a few nights back.

What's so special about this movie is the fact that it was filmed in Macau.
And alot of scenes in MGM.
It doesn't hurt that Andy still looks so handsome and even I drool when looking at Shu Qi.
According to it's Wiki page, apparently the movie is based on the relationship between Stanley Ho and his 4th wife, Angela Leong.
I really can't imagine Stanley actually riding at the back of Angela's motorcycle all around Macau or Angela actually not knowing he is the Stanley Ho when they met.
Anyways, I'm glad I didn't know all this when we watched the movie.
It would've spoilt the movie for me. No matter how handsome Andy is.

Obviously this is a rich guy meets poor gal with a happy ending kinda movie.
Andy is his charming self as usual.
Shu Qi still have a long way to go with her Cantonese pronunciation.
My friends used to tease me and said I talk like Shu Qi.
Not in a good way.
I rather look like her. Not talk like her. With wrong pronunciations.
Yes, they laughed at me -_-
I think my Cantonese have improved leaps and bounds since living in Macau.
It's so embarrassing when locals here don't understand what I'm trying to say with my limited Cantonese.
I'm still learning, but still a long way to go.
Yeah...I've stop saying "cheng sek"(which we do in Malaysia!)
It's now "luk sek" (green colour) =P

Look For A Star even has it's own website.
It has the movie trailer and a few "making of" clips.
What's cute is the Love Monopoly Chart, which is a contest.
Unfortunately, I'm way too late =(
The contest ended a long time ago.

Since the movie was filmed in Macau, and Macau is a small small country, we recognized alot of the places in the movie.
Many we don't as well!
Eric is most excited anytime there's food featured in the movie.
He wants to know where is that place!!!
If you've always wondered how the MGM casino looks like, you gotta watch this movie.
And the funny part was when Shu Qi's character was at the MGM staff entrance and locker room, Eric was going "That's our staff entrance, see our locker, so small right?"
Now I know what he's talking about when he says his locker could only fit his shoes and nothing else =P

Anyways, I cried buckets.
I get damn emo whenever I watch movies or tv shows.
And this one really got to me.
Especially the part where the character Lin Jiu when on stage to declare his love for Jo.
He said, though he is poor, he deserve to love. And he wants her to know that in this world, there is someone who loves her.
I cried and cried and cried.

I believe in love.
Deep and selfless love.
And I could feel his every word.
Because I feel the same way.
Everyone deserve to love.
It doesn't matter if you're poor, educated, handsome, ugly, short, have three eyes or blind.
We deserve to be loved for who we are.
Accepted for who we are.
And if a person could love us despite our flaws, why can't we love ourself?
In love, there is sacrifice.
There is tolerance.
There is compromise.
There is heartbreak.

But why not give love a chance?
Give ourself a chance?
Isn't a little heartache worth it in the quest to obtain happiness?

Whether a guy has money or not has never been a priority for me.
Never really had a "List of Criteria" for The One before either.
Okay...maybe a mini list.

1. He must not be a criminal. (though I must say, even some criminals have someone to love them)
2. He must have a sense of humour.
3. Intellectually we must be compatible.(a very important criteria this one)
4. No STDs. (super important)

Maybe some people might say I've set a real low standards for guys I go out with.
But I believe in giving people a chance.
Never judge a book by it's cover?

Many people also think I'm bluffing when I told them Eric had nothing much when we started dating.
No car, no money, no job.
It didn't matter to me.
When Cupid's arrow strikes you, you can only follow your heart.

So, are you looking for a star?
Look closer, the star you're looking for might already be shining it's light on you.
It might be dim but give it a chance to shine.
Even a diamond needs a little polishing to dazzle =)