So what?

I thought my birthday will pass just like a normal day.
How wrong was I.
It's the eve of my birthday and it's not a good start.

Why must the same thing happen over and over again?
How many times must it happen before the lesson is learnt?
How many times can I tolerate before I give up? For good.

Am I so forgettable?
Out of sight, out of mind?
Is it so hard to just let me know?
Am I asking for too much?
Maybe I should just go get a freaking life and not care so much.
It hurts so badly.
Nobody knows how much it affects me.
Everytime something like this happens, it's like a little piece of my heart is being bitten off.
Never to be replaced.
Eventually when too many pieces had been chewed off...I'm left with a broken heart.
I can only blame myself then.
The choice was mine.
But why make me sad.
The only witness to my tears would be my pillow.
I forgave so many times for so many things.
I've been told I'm stupid for doing it.
Because I'm not appreciated.
Just taken for granted.
Does sorry means anything anymore?
Or just a convenient word to use when the need arises?
Sorry doesn't cure the hurt.
I hate the word sorry.
Because it holds no meaning,
A promise is broken like it was never made.
Eventually...nothing will be able to mend my heart that has been chewed and stomped on.

A promise, is just a promise.
Forgotten like the wind.
Sorry, is just a sorry.
Empty like the wind.

Nobody's perfect.
Neither am I.
But I try to be the best I can be.
To make him happy.
A part of myself is lost.
And I don't know how am I going to get it back.
Maybe what people say is true...
We have no one but ourselves.

So what if it's my birthday right?
Who gives a damn.